Did you know…it’s been almost 8 years since I’ve gone swimming? At first, I stopped because I didn’t have access to a beach or a pool but then somehow I became afraid to go swimming…because I was afraid to be seen in a bathing suit. It’s mind-boggling how my own insecurity has thwarted so many wonderful opportunities in my life. It just goes to show that you don’t have to be morbidly obese to be crippled by insecurity. I’m around a size 12 and I can’t believe that I have literally been so scared about showing my body that I’ve stopped living my life!
You’re thinking, omg, she was that self-conscious?! Yeah, I was/am. Yeah, I can’t believe it either.
So I went and bought water shoes and am determined to get back in the water. It’s been raining all week so my joints are flaring up and next week comes Aunt Flo but after all that is out of the way, I vow to go swimming again! I’ve even joined a local women’s gym where there’s a pool and a sauna. I’m actually really excited. The HELL with how I look in a bathing suit. I don’t even care anymore. I just care about getting my life back.
